3 times the past 2 days I've dreamed I'm lost in an apartment building or hotel.
1st -- dreamed hub & I were renting an apartment in a different building, several blocks from our current home. It was a large house (mansion?) broken into several apartments, and ours was laid out in an odd way -- more like 2 apartments. I thought maybe we'd split them, add a bathroom & sublet the smaller half out. I realize I'm late for work. I am wandering, trying to find my way out, & see my mom has gutted one apartment & built an amazing new kitchen -- my jaw drops. She asks me to finish a chore but I have to leave for work.
2nd -- I'm in a large hotel adjoining a club I've visited before. The club is VERY small but the hotel is HUGE, one gigantic ballroom or dining room after another. I know everyone is coupled but I am alone & cannot find my way back to my room. I find myself on a mezzanine overlooking a ballroom & the most amazing staircase circles down. I know I might never have a chance to make a "grand entrance" on this type of staircase so I decide to walk down it majestically. At first the steps seem slick & I worry I might fall but soon I'm gliding down, light on my feet & feeling very dreamy-lovely.
3rd -- I'm in a hotel with a museum attached. The museum has an odd red & black theme to the floor, and has displays with small mechanical people acting out historical scenes. This time the theme is older women -- Mrs Roper (from Three's Company) comes to visit but is so old & feeble she cannot speak. My mother in law is reading her will, she wants everyone to know she doesn't have long & what to expect. My friend Lana's Aunt Frannie is doing the same. My MIL comes to where I'm sitting, hands me a check & thanks me for being good to her. I kiss her on both cheeks. I do love her.
Themes: Lost: disconnected from others though I know they are present
Vast building: cannot remember where I should be, nor how to get there
Doors: I keep trying to remember what lies behind which door so as not to retrace my steps
Windows: keep looking out windows so as to get my bearings, which direction am I facing/ heading
Older Women: My mom, the building owner, Mrs Roper, my MIL, Aunt Frannie
Showing off: walking down the stairs, bragging about my space & money making opportunities, bragging about my friends
Monday, April 26, 2010
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
A jillion years ago I used to have a zine (maga-zine, a little handwritten comic-type phamplet I made & xeroxed & distributed myself) (called Oompf!) and my BFF Marcy wrote this little story about my madmad crush on Hunter S Thompson for it.
Its kinda small & hard to read: you might save & enlarge it, or, as I like to say, bigify.
This story is not 100% true, prob less than 50% tho trust me, my hindsight is NOT 20/20. Its cute tho, and poignant. We were frustrated little girls: we were able to envision a lifestyle much heartier & more vibrant than we were capable of having. Winter in Central PA is depressing all on its own, and the particular valley we lived in seemed to trap the clouds. I remember sitting in those box cars, so bored, and feeling Sylvia Plath-like -- not like we were sitting in a bell jar but that the entire town was under some dome. I imagined a lovely creamy china teacup up-turned -- delicate, dripping, & inescapable.
Hunter had been there, & Hunter had escaped. Its important to have models & mentors in life. You might not know how you'll do it but just knowing it CAN be done has the potential to drive even the most hopeless & least motivated onward. That was the gift Hunter S gave us that winter. I still love him for it.
Here's the story Hunter S wrote about Jersey Shore.